Ghost Ship is lame.
but at least it kept me occupied for 2 hours.
and this is the first time i'm watching a 'horror' show alone.
though, it doesnt seem to be horror at all.

190 days !

motivation-less

no motivation this week.
i wanna sleep.
who the hell cares? lol.

bye and tkare people!
my blog aint going on hiatus.
and it can't afford to. lols.

oh yes! i had a bad dream last night or maybe this morning.
haha. no wait, i had 2 dreams instead.
the first one is rather weird, but this is like the 3rd/4th time on the same thing.
haha, the second one is me being killed by some ppl at jp.
they came with all sorts of weapon.
and i was slashed everywhere.
it kinda hurt.
so when i finally woke up.
my whole body was NUMB! lols.

one of my many weird dreams.

4E1! =) jinwoon is missing.

had remedial today.
maths in the morning.
chem in the afternoon
apple and aloe vera taste ohhh so good!
ran 10 rounds ard the netball court.
its been sucha long time.
but ok. i managed to survive.
i'm planning to run every sat.
so i can keep myself in shape!
after lesson, went opp for drink.
den headed home.
waited so long for that bus! arrgh.

does appearance really matter to you?
if it doesn't, then why do people go for plastic surgery?
haha, perhaps, our behaviour infront of others is nothing but an act.
its an act that we want people to remember us for.
only we know who we really are.

haha, random.

192 yay!!

suprise!
Qiuhan is leaving soon.
awwwww... sad.
yeah, i wont forget you as a classmate, as a friend.
i wish you all the best in life.
and never forget 4e1!

sometimes i think its god's gift,
without best friends, i'm blessed with a good class.
yeah, i admit, for the whole of my sec sch life.
i had very good classes.

i do look forward to graduation.
but its the people i'll miss of course.
the day will come, but i wont start thinking bout it first.
treasure the times? haha.
the best would be pe i guess.
we shouldnt be seperating though.
captains ball is still the best!

i wanna zzzz now.

suprise!
Qiuhan is leaving soon.
awwwww... sad.
yeah, i wont forget you as a classmate, as a friend.
i wish you all the best in life.
and never forget 4e1!

sometimes i think its god's gift,
without best friends, i'm blessed with a good class.
yeah, i admit, for the whole of my sec sch life.
i had very good classes.

i do look forward to graduation.
but its the people i'll miss of course.
the day will come, but i wont start thinking bout it first.
treasure the times? haha.
the best would be pe i guess.
we shouldnt be seperating though.
captains ball is still the best!

i wanna zzzz now.

the weeeekend is here SOON!
yay man! 194 to go!

i'm looking forward to the weeekend! ha, you know why.
this week is totally slack! oh no!

and happy anniversary to my blog and i. more than a year alr.
hes my best pal ever! i swear! cus he listens to me, and never talks back to me.
haha. yes, i love him damn much!
a long way to go, spiritualjoy!

195 to go!

200pounds beauty was good.
well, i guess the movie is very real,
just because you are fat and ugly, you get rejected by society,
even if you have the best talent.
so is appearance so important?
if you undergo a plastic surgery(full body)
then it becomes too artificial.
of course, you get to look pretty and people accept you.
imagine, you never had a chance to express your love because of your looks.
sad isnt it.
and when you get too obsessed to complete smth you've always wanted to,
along the way, you neglect your parents, your friends, UNKNOWINGLY.

moral of the story! don't change yourself. because, its not the same.

part of me tells me - get over it and move on with life.
the other part of me tells me - no, its part of MY memories.

i had a conversation with my pri sch mate just now.
yeah, as usual... i know you get bored listening to my old granny story. haha.
Friends today, are no longer how they are , to be exact, 5 years back.
we used to be naive, we used to be childish.
but when one grows and become more mature, we get conflicts!
oh, what is the world becoming?

If you ask me now, how many bloody conflicts i've gotten into over the 4 years,
i can tell you frankly, i can't remember, because theres too many for me to remember.
if you were to ask me the same question 4 years back,
i can tell you directly that i had one bloody conflict.
yes, i wasted one day of my pri sch life on this.
i can still remember it very clearly, even till now.
yeah, the best friend i had conflict with, is the one i was talking to,on the phone.
there is always 3 of us, and there isnt such thing as being left out? never!
we did all the crazy things together.
cry together, laugh together, sing together, wear the same clothes( this is funny! )
our parents knew each other.

ha, ask me if my mum knew any of my sec sch friends, the ans would be no.
now, its pretty obvious that i dun have much friends in sec sch.
in fact, i dun need that much.
i just need ONE. but fortunately or unfortuately, i haven found it.
and i doubt i will.
so i'll probably leave tanglin with friends and good friends.
but no best friend.

ha, prove to me, if you think i'm wrong.

damn, i end my o's a day later compared to the rest of my pri sch mates!
got lit!
but i tell myself. once i'm done, i'll be freeeeee!

the weekend is here again! yay!
and for those who know me, weekend=sleep!
hehe.

tired tired!

199 days!
whee~

today was boring.
tmr will be a better day ( i hope).

tired tired!

cheers muggers!

don't ask me why i'm blogging at this time.
well, actually i dont intend to.
but since my brain isnt really working...
so might as well. ( ok i noe i'm crapping now ).
today had farewell. pretty simple, no tears, no nothing.
and well. i still prefer those teary ones though.
cus you say what you really feel. yeah...
and its how you feel that actually makes ppl cry.
awwww.

okay, after that went to Vivo.
and i must say i feeeel so greaaat!
finally, a taste of a shopping center?
B&J ice cream! free cone day!
so means free lah! lols. not ALOT of ppl though.
it taste sooooo good! yummy!
maybe its becus its been sucha long time since i had one.
slacked ard, till quite late.
went home. did hwk.
and here i am, after an hr of rest.
i was left laughing alone in the bus.
well, i did try to control myself and not make it sooo obvious.
but ok, i think people might just think i'm crazy.

so cute! haha.

and then when you invert it... thats the virus or bacteria. i forgot.

hehe.
its 202 now. past 12 alr.

i wanna hang out with my clique
i wanna go shopping at town
i wanna catch a movie
i wanna go swimming
i wanna watch football
i just wanna get off home, a lil while, please?

i had time to look through my neoprints in my wallet today.
yeah, i take them out and look at them once in awhile.
haha, i became so fat! the cheek-fats, you call it.
suddenly, there was like flashback of all the fun we had.
sometimes i wonder, is it when you're no longer close,
that you'll start missing, and treasuring each other more?
you can make friends anytime anywhere.
so whats with losing a friend?
(if that friend isnt worth your time of cus)
friends were never a problem for me,
and i wouldnt let it be a problem.

next. if i dont understand you, then dont talk to me.
i was a reserve too, then.
being fielded in the 2nd team, what could i do?
first, you have to deal with your own feelings...
the fact that you MIGHT(take note, its MIGHT) not be as good as those in the first, thats why you are here.
Second, how can the 2nd team win the 1st team when all the strong ones are there?
thats how i felt at least.
but i thought through... what is more impt is how you play with the diff teams.
and if you work hard, or even harder, you hardwork will pay off.
and eventually, you'll earn a place in the first team.
the trick is, no matter where you're put in, just play without complains.
thats what i've learnt, at least.

207!

it has been such a long time since i witnessed a dramatic match...
today, i did.
was watching the 'B' soccer boys play against.. Yishun sec.
and the ref was like damn bias.
we saw it, all of us did.
AND, i detest bias umpires(in netball) referees(in soccer)
the decisions they make, made feel like slapping them.
haha. if its netball, i'm feeling frustrated.
den, good thing i'm not a soccer player.
haha, but seriously, the ref today was like obviously unfair.
2 red cards to our side, and i thought i was totally unnecessary,
since they are alr into the 2nd round, why get more ppl suspended?
aww, maybe the ref was bribed. or some personal hatred towards our sch.
He knows.
but good thing, the boys managed to maintain the score towards the end of the game.
so they won 3-2!
congrats!!=)
and i'm like damn jealous!
3rd in west zone, top 8 or even higher in nationals.
we're 2nd in west, but where are we in nationals man!

but anyhooos, well done isham!
lucks for the next game!

208! my psle t score! hehe.

i'm tired!!!

209!

alright, today was just another day of school.
except that i just couldnt stop laughing.
i dunnoe what got into me.
but... well, at least this is like kinda temporary,
if one day it comes permanant,
den you'll see me as a Permanant Resident in yeah, IMH.
haha.

bio test tmr. shooots.
and we're doing Log tmr! wonderful! haha.

&&& i miss my clique so damn much.
after chinese paper?! anybody?! haha.

damn, i just realised tss is lik sooooo slooowww.
all of my other friend's exam timetable are like out alr.
and they are starting mye at the end of april.
i dun even noe whens mine.
this is pathetic.

its 210 to go! we'll reach there, sooooon.

As requested, Thomas, your new playlist. haha.
no chinese songs though, not that i dont like them.
i'm just outdated.
haha, and eng songs sounds better too.

i'm worrying bout how i'm gonna handle my mye.
darn. and its les than a month to mye mind you.
and CHINESE o's?! freak... i'm not ready...

211=)

Forgive & Forget - is it human nature?

This was one of my essay topics for my weekend homework.
To forgive and forget.
It left me,half of the time pondering about the things i should do, to forgive and forget.
Relating it to a situation of mine, a very very similar situation.

I would agree that most of the time,
we find it extremely hard to admit our mistakes especially major mistakes.
at the same time, deep in our heart, we seek forgiveness from the other party.
All of us, i believe have unpleasant encounters in life.(Yes, we all do)
Life is short, how much time can we spare on yesterday's trespasses.
We ought to forgive and forget, but never will we forget the experience.
and the experience is probably what that will guide us through similar situations in the future.

Forgiving and Forgetting is no longer a case of whos wrong and whos right.
and its about how to feel towards this particular person.
Of couse, having said that its good to F&F( short form lah.. i've been repearing!),
it would also much depend on alot of factors.
Time, Relationship and of course, how serious the situation is.
At times, you might think you've forgotten.
but suddenly, a tiny lil thing can make you recall all the things.

I believe its human nature, or its natural to say that WE,
see the Bad(s) more than the Good(s).
you can totally forget what this person have done for you,
but for the bad, you would remember it for the rest of your life.
By not forgiving, we develop a sense of hatred and mistrust towards the person.
so is the best way- to let go?

I've tried letting it go over the past few months.
well, i would frankly say, i didnt managed to.
We all have Memories.
and Memories are not always those sweet ones,
they do consist some that you don't want to remember.
but its just INSIDE. remember, (you didnt choose to)

The closer the relationship, the more hurtful it is.
make sense?! and is this one of the reasons why i find it so hard to let go? , perhaps.
I dont want this to happen either.
tell me who doesnt want to live a peaceful life, not being hated, and not to hate someone.
okay, maybe hate is too strong for this case, dislike would be a better word.
If only i could let go, i definitely will.
and i'm trying to.
but i will never forget what she have done that have haunted me over the past few months.
and i'm utterly disappointed with her, even till today.
at the same time, i do have umpteen questions running through my head,
which i believed can never be answered. and i don't bother to check it out either.

I dont know how long this will take, but if time heals, den i'll let it be.

If we can let the past be the past,
then what is the point of having a memory?

Having said that Today is a brand new day.
that doesnt mean, we dont remember anything from yesterday.

I've proven my point.

i'm throwing back the question at you,
can YOU forgive and forget?

as much as i dont want this to happen,
there will be a point where theres an end to everything?
well, at least farewell is pushed back for a week,
due to holidays, church activities, lessons...
and what have you?! so instead of having our farewell this sat(TMR, mind you!)
it'll be changed to the following saturday.
at least i can have the luxury of staying a lil while more?
still, their first combined training will start tmr.
25/26 people in the bdiv..
fighting for main 12.
on top of that, the starting 7 line up.
all i can say is whao! *thank god i'm not in there*
rivalry, hatred cant be avoided in such a big team like that.
( i'm alr having this prob with 19 people, imagine 25 or 26)
friendly competition btwn one another?
bull-shit! who doesnt want to play?!

the next captain.
oh wait, the currect captain i mean...
gets tougher each year, dealing with more and more people...
whats more important is the ability to pull the team together.
to be respected, and dont do anything to make people despise you.
seriously, what capt are you, when your people dont look up to you?
what position are you in to lead? or is it just the name of being a CAPTAIN.
ok, thats not the main point here.
i believe that she'll make a good captain, so please don't disappoint me =)

my advice to all juniors, work hard in your own areas...
treasure your chances on court.
no matter who gets chosen to play, you guys are still part of Tanglin Netball.
i dont wish to see History repeat itself,
and please dont let it happen.
i dont think theres any chance to slack.
you slack out you go! hardwok will pay off someday!
so jiayou! west zone champs 2008?!
you set the target, we'll see the result!

and to those who are following my footstep,
of blaming yourself for the losses,
PLEASE DONT! theres no room for such nonsence.
and yeah, for all you know, i've been "sent-off"
dont take your mistakes too hard.
and work hard to get back the ball!
i've realised all this too late. far too late...

216!

am i still blessed?

today's lessons were pretty alright.
at least i manage to keep myself awake,
except for hy and a lil of chem.
had physics spa today.
think i'm gonna screw up also.

after school, studied a lil amaths.
played netball, watched the B boys play.
they won 2-1! they fought hard! =)
so now that our season is over, lets hope that they will go far!
they said i was blessed not getting injured over the 4 years of netball.
i thought i was... haha, but i was wrong today!
never in my life i had sprained my ankle.
and today was the first.
i must say it hurts to SHIT.( first time lah) haha.
and it still hurts now.
i must promise myself i would land properly with the ball.
and never let it happen the 2nd time.
haha.
crap!

ok i missed out smth, 217 days.

giraffes's neck expanded VERTICALLY, due to global warming?
haha, and the birdies that are forever at the window.
going through, Genes=Jeans?
you and your cousin share the same JEANS?!
thats the reason why you cant marry any of your 'own blood'.
thats my bio lesson for you, we're now on heridity,i think!

other than that, STRESS LAH!
& i kinda miss netball now.
so its like i've been playing netball after school everyday? haha.

218! yay!

self-motivated. hahaha.

my horoscope says: Discipline is good for you right now -- it will prepare you for something big that's coming soon. You won't regret delaying gratification.

i'm JEALOUS lah! haha, yeah right...

yay! thomas said my blog was nice.
and this comes like once in a blue moon.
i cant even remember when was the previous time, someone said my blog was nice!
ha, alright, so today was quite crappy.
i was quite pissed off with some stuffs.
lessons still went on...
and i was super tired today, despite having lots of sleep over the weekends.

219.

i miss NETBAL CAMP!
that was 2 years ago.
now, everybody have grown!=)

i wont have to introduce , that "famous" celebrity.
the pornstar everyone is talking about?
i dun wanna swear, i dun wanna curse.
not good for my health. *breathe in, breathe out*
nvm, such low IQ people, is not worth my time.
cummon, i have better things to do, unlike you.

220days to end of o's.
i'm alr counting down. heh.