today is a bad day.
i had a bad toothache,
and thats not bad enough lah.
i'm stressed up.
not by exams. but by all the things that are happening around me right now.
my friends, my family and myself.

i dont wish to talk about my friends problems,
because i have many of them, facing the same problem, including myself.
so i'll save it for later.

so for my family stuff. my mum is like the only one supporting the family.
and my brother is not decisive on what he wants to do in life.
and hes calling it quits for ns, and wants to study.
i'm not against that, but i can see how stress my mum is.
from young till now lah. its obvious that my mum had been more money and time,
on him for his studies than i do. but i have never blamed her for that.
and she even said that if she cannot handle the stress, she would do smth not very gd to herself, which i dun wanna mention, cus its not nice to hear.
and i cant afford to lose anyone in my life right now. anymore.
so hopefully, my bro would be able to think this time round,
and decides on what he really wants to do. i dun wanna see him in a bad state in future too.
i want him to have a good future. i might quarrel with him at points of time, i mean everytime. but of cus, i still care about him and his future, and i dont want him to follow the footsteps of my mum, whos working damn hard now, for us. its damn sad lah k.
so my mum told me not to create any trouble for her, cus shes alr very stressed.
i caught what she meant. she must be refering to the BGR matter.
okay, that leads to my next problem. haha

didnt i just mentioned that my feelings arent fading.
so something INTERESTING happened.
and i wouldnt want to elaborate more,
cus it makes me even more angry and i feel like cursing. haha. i better dont.
so we were on the verge of breaking. AGAIN.
haha, its always the same reason.
and each time, he claims he Dont Have.
i'm SUPER JEALOUS! i admit, haha.
so in the end, we didnt. cus we didnt want to afterall.
54 more days and i wonder how i'm gonna face him again.
the promises we've made is holding me back each time.
but..... this is the real test.
and i'm gonna pass it (:

happy belated birthday,YUNHUA!
happy birthday,JINGYING!